It’s my kid’s birthday next week.
He’ll be 4. Pretty much the best age ever.
In his honor, I thought I’d share some of the weird, wacky Lego dudes he’s constructed over the last year.
See, he and I have this game. It goes a little like this:
- I buy a Lego set and spend an hour or two building it
- He immediately disassembles it and builds something different
- I drink to drown my Lego sorrows
I joke…mostly. Seriously, I love building Legos with him. His imagination is up for anything, anytime. And sometimes (meaning all the time) the crazy blend of superheroes/villains/random dudes he creates cracks me up. He knows it makes me laugh, and so he does it every chance he gets.
I present to you:
G Man’s Top 10 Super Villain Random Anti-Heroes
![Lego 2](http://tesseraguild.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/04/Lego-2.jpg)
Super Sauron Riddler with Flame Pants and Coffee. He’s full of caffeine and ready to conquer Middle Krypton.
![photo 3](http://tesseraguild.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/04/photo-3.jpg)
It’s the eagle from Lord of the Rings. As ridden by Princess Uni-Kitty. If I’m Sam and Frodo suffering on the slopes of Mount Doom, I’m pissed if this is my rescue squad.
![photo 2](http://tesseraguild.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/04/photo-2.jpg)
Gandalf. Wearing stormtrooper armor. With a batarang in hand. Standing on the top of Barad Dur. In other words, this is how Sauron was REALLY defeated.
![photo 6](http://tesseraguild.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/04/photo-6.jpg)
Instead of ‘when pigs fly,’ G Man decided he’d change the saying to ‘when Minecraft skeletons ride Nazgul horses.’ Same thing, really.
![photo 7](http://tesseraguild.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/04/photo-7.jpg)
I’m pretty sure I dated this girl. Robot. Thin. Carried a longbow. Nice hair. I can’t remember why we broke up.
![photo 4](http://tesseraguild.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/04/photo-4.jpg)
Anyone remember that movie/Sat Night Live sketch, The Coneheads? Ok, so G Man’s never seen either. Whatever. Imagine you’re a shrink and this dude’s sitting on YOUR couch…
![photo 5](http://tesseraguild.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/04/photo-5.jpg)
Some random guy with a Sauron hat lording over a parapalegic zombie with sweet hair. With a bullhorn. And a shovel. No other kid has ever created this scene. I’m sure of it.
![photo 8](http://tesseraguild.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/04/photo-8.jpg)
When I asked G Man what this scene was all about, he said, “They’re eating fish for dinner.” I’m thinking, ‘Does Gollum really have the biceps to carry that sword?’
![Lego 1](http://tesseraguild.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/04/Lego-1.jpg)
Lord Business kicking Vetruvius off the counter. (The kid never really approved of Lord Business NOT winning in The Lego Movie.)
Somebody buy the G Man some green Creeper Legos.
He’s got some terrifying ideas for ’em.
Seriously.
Check out my Coffee Table Philosophy series here
I know you know this, but your boy is awesome. 😀
Thank you. His awesomeness more than makes up for my lack of it.